17 October 2010

Did you miss me?

My apologies, loyal blog readers.  I know I have been silent for a ridiculously long length of time.  The issue has been, Monkey3 destroyed the power cord for my laptop by sticking something long and slender (my money is on the screwdriver) into the plug.  No, I didn't see him do it.  Yes, regardless, I'm certain it was him.

Computer-less, I have been reduced to checking my e-mail in the briefest possible of interludes between dinnertime and bedtime stories, using The Mad Scientist's computer.  Hence, no blogging. 

But a solution is on the way, and we (remarkably) managed to eat dinner a bit early tonight.  (This was possible because The Mad Scientist put the pot roast in the crockpot this morning before church, while I was drying my hair.  When I am cooking, we never eat before six.)  So, I am snatching this bit of unexpected time to let you know I'm still alive.  I'm certain you've been concerned.

Since I am still not on my own computer, I have no pictures to show you.  They're all still on the camera.  However, I'd like to share something funny that happened earlier this evening.  It began as I was stirring pecans on the stove, and my husband walked up behind  me and wrapped his arms around me.  We stood like that for a while, making small talk (really, not metaphorically; I didn't want to burn the pecans), and at some point in the conversation the phrase "take me away" was mentioned.

I sighed and said "I like it when you take me away."  Then, remembering this phrase as the sometime slogan of Calgon Bath and Beauty products ("Calgon, Take Me Away" or something along those lines),  I continued after a moment "You're much better than Calgon."

Now, The Mad Scientist (I guarantee) has never heard of Calgon bath and beauty products, still less of their "take me away" ad campaign.  His hands, which had been rubbing my shoulders, paused, and just as I realized what that must have sounded like to him, he asked "Who's 'Calvin'?"


Having managed (once I stopped laughing) to profer a satisfactory explanation, we sat down to dinner.  I had made stuffed acorn squash to go with the pot roast.  Monkey1 does not like acorn squash.  I scraped a quarter of a squash onto his plate, mashed it up with the stuffing (apples and pecans, with cinnamon and just a bit of sugar), divided it into two piles, and told him to choose one and eat it.

He sighed.  He eyed them.  He announced his distaste for acorn squash...several times.  He ate some pot roast, and voiced his displeasure with the side dish once again.  He was told to eat it, or there would be no dessert...and he would get the squash again tomorrow.  He said "I'd like to eat this tomorrow."

We reminded him of the dessert stipulation, and he requested "a really tall glass of water.  Actually, can I have two?"  Finally, he began eating the squash, one molecule at a time.  Once or twice he informed us that he was barely keeping it down.

The other monkeys finished and were excused, and The Mad Scientist and I left the table also, not to encourage the performance by providing an audience.  When I peered back around the corner, he appeared to be in his death throes.

Finally he managed to finish and announced cheerfully "All my squash is gone!  Can I have more pot roast?"  Having received this, and taken several bites, he declared "This is even better than the squash!"

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